Permission to Pause: Why Rest is Not a Four-Letter Word
Show Notes:
Summary:
Every now and then, we hit a lull in our lives where everything feels a bit dimmer, and that’s what I’m exploring in this episode! It’s about those moments when you feel like you’re still doing all the right things but inside, something feels a bit off. I’ve been there—trust me, I’ve been juggling the demands of life and suddenly found myself staring at a blank page, unsure of what to say or create. But guess what? This quiet season doesn’t mean you’re failing; it means you’re evolving, and sometimes, we just need to take a breather to reignite that inner flame.
Timestamps:
00:02 Introduction to owning your power and presence over 50
01:16 The true essence of presence and self-belief
02:25 Challenging societal pressures and the quest for perfection
03:42 Addressing the "invisible woman" stereotype and its impacts
06:10 Empowering responses to age-related stereotypes
07:04 Practical tips for enhancing self-presence
09:37 Using your voice effectively to command respect
11:21 Looking ahead to communication strategies for respect and presence
12:10 Weekly challenge: Observing and emulating presence
13:06 Closing thoughts and invitation to engage with the podcast community
Key Takeaways:
- If you're feeling like your spark has dimmed, it doesn't mean you're failing; it's simply a sign of evolving through life's seasons.
- In our fast-paced world, it's crucial to remember that taking a pause is not a sign of weakness, but a form of self-care and growth.
- A quiet season can actually be sacred; it allows for reflection and clarity, paving the way for future growth.
- Rest, reflection, and doing nothing can be valid forms of productivity that contribute to personal growth and well-being.
- The fire within you may return differently, but it will return, so honor the quiet moments as they are part of the journey.
- Remember, you are not broken or behind; you are simply in a season of growth and transformation, becoming more aligned with your true self.
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Transcript
Have you ever felt like the fire that used to fuel you just faded?
Speaker A:Like you're still showing up, doing all the things, even smiling through it.
Speaker A:But deep inside, something's missing.
Speaker A:The energy, the excitement, the spark.
Speaker A:It's just not there.
Speaker A:That's where I've been.
Speaker A:Not just tired, but quiet.
Speaker A:I haven't posted on Instagram in weeks.
Speaker A:Not because I didn't care, but because I had so much on my plate, I didn't even know where to start.
Speaker A:I'd open the app.
Speaker A:I'd stare at that blinking cursor and ask myself, what do I even want to say right now?
Speaker A:And the deeper question underneath it all was, do I even have the energy for this anymore?
Speaker A:If you are in a season like that, I want you to know you're not failing.
Speaker A:You're evolving.
Speaker A:And sometimes the fire doesn't just go out.
Speaker A:It just waits for us to slow down long enough to feel it.
Speaker B:Living our best life.
Speaker B:It's good to be alive, but it's best to truly live.
Speaker B:Let your spirit bright celebrate the journey every single day.
Speaker B:Aging with growth, grace, and sty in our own special way.
Speaker A:Welcome to Aging with Grace and Style, the podcast where we embrace midlife as a season of bold growth, honest reflection, and unapologetic purpose.
Speaker A:I'm your host, Valerie, and today's episode is going to be a little different.
Speaker A:It's less of a lesson and more of a moment, a pause, a conversation from my heart to yours.
Speaker A:Because I don't have all the answers today, but I do have a question.
Speaker A:What if this quiet season that you're in is actually sacred?
Speaker A:Now let me take you behind the curtain for a second.
Speaker A:These past few weeks, I have felt overwhelmed.
Speaker A:Life has been full.
Speaker A:And in all that fullness, I started to feel empty.
Speaker A:In my last podcast, I talked about how life had been lifing.
Speaker A:Go back and listen to it.
Speaker A:I'll put the information in the notes.
Speaker A:But I wasn't creating.
Speaker A:I wasn't posting.
Speaker A:I wasn't producing like I usually do.
Speaker A:And for a while, I felt guilty about that.
Speaker A:I kept thinking, am I letting people down?
Speaker A:Am I still doing what I'm called to do?
Speaker A:Is this a sign that I just need to walk away from everything or something?
Speaker A:And then, almost like clockwork, I got a call.
Speaker A:And it was from someone that I deeply respect.
Speaker A:And it was totally out of the blue.
Speaker A:And she said, valerie, I just wanted you to know that I was thinking about you.
Speaker A:And I wanted to tell you how much your.
Speaker A:Your podcast and your Monday morning boost have blessed Me.
Speaker A:They carry so much positivity and power.
Speaker A:And the ones who need to hear it, they will.
Speaker A:Y'all.
Speaker A:I literally got chills because it was in that moment when I was doubting my purpose.
Speaker A:God sent confirmation through someone who didn't even know that I was struggling.
Speaker A:So today, I want to pass that blessing on to you.
Speaker A:If you're feeling like your fire is dim, maybe what you need isn't more effort.
Speaker A:Maybe it's permission to pause.
Speaker A:We live in a world that worships momentum, productivity, and visibility, especially as women over 50.
Speaker A:We're told to stay active, to stay relevant, and to stay on.
Speaker A:Like our worth depends on whether we're still in motion.
Speaker A:But here's the truth.
Speaker A:Rest is not retreat.
Speaker A:Stillness is not weakness.
Speaker A:And silence is not a sign that you've lost your way.
Speaker A:Sometimes the quiet is just where the clarity lives.
Speaker A:I used to think that burnout had to look like a total breakdown, but now I know it often shows up more subtly.
Speaker A:It looks like always feeling on, but never really present, saying yes to things that you don't have the capacity for, feeling guilty when you choose rest over results.
Speaker A:Does that sound familiar?
Speaker A:You're not broken.
Speaker A:You're human.
Speaker A:And pausing isn't quitting.
Speaker A:It's tending.
Speaker A:So let me gently ask you, have you checked in with yourself lately?
Speaker A:I mean, really paused?
Speaker A:Sat with what you're carrying and asked your spirit how it's doing?
Speaker A:Let's do that.
Speaker A:Now take a breath with me.
Speaker A:Drop your shoulders, unclench your jaw, and just let your mind soften.
Speaker A:Now ask yourself, where in my life am I forcing something that's just begging to be paused?
Speaker A:And what am I afraid will fall apart if I stop?
Speaker A:What do I need more of?
Speaker A:And what can I release?
Speaker A:Don't worry about fixing anything.
Speaker A:Just be honest and let your answers rise gently to the surface.
Speaker A:This is a sacred space, and your truth, it belongs here.
Speaker A:In this quiet season.
Speaker A:I've learned a few things.
Speaker A:Some hard, some beautiful.
Speaker A:I've learned that silence doesn't mean that you're forgotten.
Speaker A:I've learned that people will still be there when you return.
Speaker A:And I've learned that sometimes you can be pouring out wisdom and still need someone to pour into you.
Speaker A:That phone call from a friend reminded me that our impact often reaches much further than we can see.
Speaker A:Just because people aren't always responding doesn't mean that they aren't receiving.
Speaker A:I'm also learning to reevaluate what truly fills me up, what drains me, even if it once excited me.
Speaker A:Shoot.
Speaker A:Things change.
Speaker A:This pause has helped me ask new questions, like what's aligned for this season of my life?
Speaker A:Because what was good for the last season may not be what I need to do at this point.
Speaker A:What content, what conversations, what commitments still feel like.
Speaker A:Yes, in my spirit, and most of all, I'm learning to listen.
Speaker A:Not to the algorithm, which totally trips us all up.
Speaker A:Not to expectations, but to God, to my body, and to my intuition.
Speaker A:I want to give you four ways to embrace your own pause without guilt.
Speaker A:Number one.
Speaker A:Call it what it is.
Speaker A:Say it out loud.
Speaker A:I'm in a slower season right now.
Speaker A:Naming it gives it dignity.
Speaker A:Number two.
Speaker A:Redefine what counts as productive.
Speaker A:Rest, reflection, and doing nothing are valid forms of growth.
Speaker A:Now, you know, I have talked to you before about how I struggle with doing nothing.
Speaker A:Um, I think through this period, I've kind of been forced into times of doing nothing because I couldn't produce and do the things that I wanted to do because I was focused on something else.
Speaker A:Number three is protect your energy like it's sacred, because you know what?
Speaker A:It really is sacred.
Speaker A:Not everyone gets access to your time, and you don't need to explain why.
Speaker A:Number four, believe this.
Speaker A:The fire will return.
Speaker A:It may come back differently, quieter, deeper, more focused, but it will return.
Speaker A:So in the meantime, don't rush it.
Speaker A:Just tend to it.
Speaker A:Honor it.
Speaker A:Let the flame rebuild from inside out.
Speaker A:If this message spoke to you, where you are right now, then I want to hear from you.
Speaker A:Send me a dm.
Speaker A:Share this episode with someone who needs it.
Speaker A:Because I know I am not the only one going through this.
Speaker A:Or post your own reflection and tag me.
Speaker A:You can even just write it in a journal, Whatever feels right for you.
Speaker A:But let's remind each other, this pause that we're in, it's not the end.
Speaker A:It's the beginning of something more aligned.
Speaker A:So let me leave you with this.
Speaker A:You're not behind.
Speaker A:You're not broke, broken.
Speaker A:You're not less than.
Speaker A:Because you're resting.
Speaker A:You are becoming.
Speaker A:You are rebuilding.
Speaker A:You are listening.
Speaker A:And when the time is right, your voice, your vision, your fire, it will rise stronger than ever.
Speaker A:So here's your permission slip.
Speaker A:You have permission to pause.
Speaker A:You have permission to rest.
Speaker A:You have permission to honor your rhythm and to trust that even in the quiet, you're still growing.
Speaker A:If this episode gave you something.
Speaker A:Peace, clarity, permission.
Speaker A:Would you do me a favor and share it?
Speaker A:Text it to a friend, post it on Instagram, or leave a review.
Speaker A:You never know who needs this reminder, too?
Speaker A:And if you haven't already done so, hit that follow button, we've got more conversation coming.
Speaker A:Real ones.
Speaker A:The kind that help us rise with grace and grow in purpose.
Speaker A:Until next time, keep listening, keep honoring your season, and keep aging with grace, style, and, of course, a touch of sass.
Speaker A:Thanks for hanging out with me today.
Speaker A:If you love this episode, do me a favor, share it with a friend and leave a quick review.
Speaker A:It's a small thing that makes a big difference.
Speaker A:Don't forget to subscribe so you never miss an episode.
Speaker A:And hey, let's keep the conversation going.
Speaker A:Join me at pod.agingwithgraceinstyle.com for more tips, stories, and a whole lot of connection.
Speaker A:Until next time, keep shining with grace, style, and a touch of.
